As we approach Valentine’s Day, I am always surprised at the outcry of “misery” displayed on social media when it comes to being single. Truth is, you can be happily single, living a full, and complete life.
Don’t let public display of affection and social media fool you. Just because someone is married or in a relationship, does not mean they are happy. And as a single woman determined to live “by her own rules,” I assure you, there’s more to life than who you’re linked to romantically.
Don’t get me wrong. Having love, especially genuine love, and someone to experience life with is beautiful. But until you find that right someone, I want you consider a few things you should be happy about. If you are successful in any one of these areas in your life, then it is a testament to the magnitude of life you have in your life and your accomplishments.
Before you meet your other half, many of us are born alone. We have a purpose. Should we find our passions and explore the depth and heights they can take us, we can live a well-rounded life filled with intention.
Your Friends Circle – Your friends, when chosen correctly, can become the family and support system you’ve always wanted and needed. And perhaps, they can become an extension of the one you already have. Having healthy adult friendships become crucial to your growth and extended community of people you can call on when you’re in need. It’s these meaningful bonds and relationships that can serve to fill voids in your life. As you age together and you hit milestones, having the people who matter to you the most is fulfilling.
Your Passions – It’s never too late to find a hobby or invest more into your passions. I think it’s important to have hobbies you are passionate about. They’re good for your mental health. Exploring these passions, be it writing, painting singing, arts and crafts, volunteer work or whatever creative outlet, can not only fill any sense of loss or void in your life, these passions are often the start of something beautiful; a project, a business, a career and could even lead you to meet people of similar interests, even your life-partner.
Your Child/ren – Your kids are your legacy. So who else can motivate you more than them? Let’s be honest, raising children is not for the faint at heart. But, for those who are unattached and childless, not having legacy can be a double-edge sword. Children are a blessing so cherish them and create meaningful experiences together as they grow and as you grow with them. Pouring into their future and having the love of a child is a beautiful and purposeful experience. The love of a child is one of the purest form of love.
Your Career – Some of us are fortunate to have found a career that combines your strengths and your passions. If this is you, your work can be fulfilling. Though it’s important not to become a workaholic to fill the void of being lonely, committing yourself to a career you love is an accomplishment. Follow your dreams, start that business, climb the corporate ladder, switch careers entirely. Go for everything your heart desires while you have the time. A committed relationship and marriage, while great to have, can slow you down because of the responsibilities of being in one. So while you can commit to being focused on your career goals, reach for the stars.
Your Freedom – As I’ve stated, while a relationship can be beautiful, having the freedom to do whatever your heart desires, on your time, by your rules, wherever in the world is a privilege. Granted, should you have the means.
And I don’t just mean the freedom to casually date one person or even multiple people (if that’s your thing), but to travel, explore new hobbies and adventures. Take a job abroad, Live in a different city or country.
Having other responsibilities like being a parent and taking care of loved ones can impact your ability to do some of these things. It’s in these moments that we discover our true selves.
If you’re not “yet” tied down to anyone or anything, go live!
Dating Yourself – Who else can serve as the best blueprint for how to date you than you? In order to know what you want and deserve, you’ve got to date yourself sis. Travel. Go to that restaurant. Buy yourself that gift. Splurge on you. You deserve it. Do and be everything you desire in a partner and set the tone for when they come along. Go be the woman of your dreams and enjoy being happily single.
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